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Blasts from the Past

by Randi Rhodes posted May 23 2012 5:26PM
There is a new pro-Obama ad with Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, and a whole Fox News rogues’ gallery of conservatives ripping Romney over Bain. It looks like one of those feeding frenzies where the sharks start to eat each other. Too bad politicians don’t get residuals for appearing in political ads—Newt Gingrich would make so much money in anti-Romney ads that he could pay off his campaign debt! The one-two punch of Newt Gingrich and Rick Perry is amazing to watch. It’s pompous and doofus! It helps a lot that all of the Republicans in these ads attacking Romney truly despise Mitt Romney. Their sincerity really comes through. Republicans look a lot more sincere attacking Mitt Romney than they do when they’re endorsing Mitt Romney while an elevator shuts on their face.

Joe Biden ripped into Mitt Romney yesterday by saying “we will not go back to the 50’s.” Mitt Romney was so shocked he almost dropped his hula-hoop. In fairness to Mitt, at least he just wants to go back to the 1950’s. There are other elements of the Republican Party that want to go back to the 1850’s, not to mention the 1450’s.

Biden also said that working in private equity “no more qualifies you to be president than being a plumber.” At least if a plumber was president, they would be used to dealing with big loads of crap causing obstructions... and that would prepare them to handle John Boehner. Working in private equity might not qualify you to be president, but it certainly qualifies you to run for president—it makes you ruthless, cruel, and dishonest. OK, I shouldn’t say that Mitt Romney’s work in private equity made him ruthless, cruel, and dishonest. Mitt was already that way when he started in private equity—just look at his years at prep school.

Well, Rush Limbaugh has gotten busted, but not in the way that he deserves. He actually got busted in the opposite of the way that he deserves. A bust of Rush is now in the Hall of Famous Missourians in the Missouri Capitol building. In a photo, the bust doesn’t look very lifelike at all. Oh wait, that’s Rush’s actual head. It’s a good it’s a bust instead of a full statue. There isn’t enough bronze in the world to make a full-body statue of Rush Limbaugh.

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05/23/2012 5:34PM
Blasts from the Past
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