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Agent Orange

by Randi Rhodes posted May 16 2012 5:36PM
John Boehner has thrown down the gauntlet! Either that or he dropped it. When you drink as much as John, sometimes it’s hard to hold on to your gauntlet. Boehner vowed to block the next increase in the debt ceiling unless it’s offset by spending cuts larger than the increase. John is getting very combative. Somebody take him home before he ends up punching a parking meter. Make no mistake—these debt ceiling dramas damage the full faith and credit of the United States. But then damaging the United States is exactly what the Republicans want to do before the election.

Boehner’s remarks on the debt ceiling were coordinated with an attack by Mitt Romney on President Obama over the national debt. The theme of Romney’s debt speech was a prairie fire—a rather appropriate metaphor, seeing as how all the facts got obscured in a thick veil of smoke. Romney said that “A prairie fire of debt is sweeping” across America. That’s bad news, since Republicans have cut funding for basic services like fire-fighting.

George W. Bush has finally endorsed Mitt Romney, in the most unenthusiastic endorsement since... well, since the last person endorsed Mitt Romney. Bush endorsement consisted of him muttering “I’m for Mitt Romney” as a pair of elevators doors slid closed on him. Going down, Mr. President? That endorsement couldn’t have looked any weaker if Bush had actually been holding his nose when he said it. Bush doesn’t intend to campaign for Romney. Too bad, Bush and Romney deserve each other—the worst president who ever was, and the worst president who never will be.

James Lipton of “Inside the Actors Studio” has some advice for Mitt Romney on “how to act human.”   Unfortunately, Mitt simply isn’t convincing as a human being. Lipton says that Mitt’s laugh is not believable. I’m actually a little relieved by that, seeing as how the things he’s laughing about are things like beating up a gay kid, or the time his dad shut down that factory. According to Lipton, Mitt Romney exhibits what performers call “flop sweat.” In the case of Mitt Romney, it should be called “flip-flop sweat.” Lipton’s final advice to Romney is to just be who he really is. Hey, if Mitt comes off as an insincere phony, maybe that’s who he really is.

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05/16/2012 5:36PM
Agent Orange
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